Stop Trying To Succeed!

This fall nearly 15 million students will step on to college campuses across the United States. If you are one of those 15 million my guess is you will soon be bombarded with a million different paths to choose from. Your first semester of college can be overwhelming with choices and many students are paralyzed with options. I was one of them!

This fall I want to give you some of the best advice I never received in college but which has made all the difference since. STOP TRYING TO SUCCEED.

Every student has a different vision for their first year on campus. Some envision themselves winning in their social life, academics, relationships and all other arenas of life. Others dread the thought that they may not live up to the standards others have set as success in college. My advice to all of you is to stop trying to succeed. Success is out of your control. One of the best quotes I've run across these past 5 years comes from Joshua Medcalf the author of "Burn Your Goals". In his book he says, “We don’t have control over outcomes, but we do have control over how we use our time.” This gets to the heart of the matter!

In college I spent the majority of my time worrying about outcomes. Will people like me? Will I get into the right Greek house? Can I get an A in this class? And so on and so forth. The fact of the reality is that no one can control the outcomes of life. Life is hard. Life is unpredictable. Those who try to control the outcomes of life often fall short of their expectations. My advice, take Josh at his word. Instead of trying to control the outcomes in your life, spend time instead controlling how you use your time.

Instead of saying "Will people like me?" say "How can I use my time to develop my social skills?". Instead of saying "Can I get an A in this class?" say "How can I use my time today to do well academically." Outcomes are out of your control, but how you use your time to pursue outcomes is not. Once I took this to heart my life took a new turn in motivation and purpose.

As you head into college this fall stop trying to control the outcomes in your life. Once you learn to let go of the outcomes you can begin to focus on what is important. How you control the use of your time is so much more important than the outcomes in life. If you can master this principle early on than the outcomes you desire will surely follow.

Stop trying to succeed and take back control of your life!